THE TROUBLE OF OVER FORTIES: EPISODE 3.
Over forties come in different flavours. There are those who deferred marriage for the academic laurel. There are those who were just sceptical and time had run out on them. There are those who could not determine mister right from mister wrong. Whatever the flavour they all show some similar characteristics. In most cases they do not have heart to love again. Their life is more meaningful and based on certainty as such no fantasies appease them. Becky loved and admired her father so much. He was the first man in her life. She trusted and counted on him. She was actually very happy for his academic support. He was able to make Becky in to thinking tank. Becky at ten could work very complicated mathematical problems. The day her father taught her dy/dx she felt conquering the world. Since then Becky did not reckon with any man for she could do more than most men in terms of book. At college the men avoided her for she belittled them. Becky has a brain smart as that of fish. Becky was not all brains but wits and guts. She was ready to challenge the men on any day anytime.
At thirty five she had had a second degree in a rare discipline. The interview was short and Becky was hired. Her two years spell with the bank saw her rose to the position of branch manager. Her ability to balance Trial Balances at sight, coupled with her speed at which she could used Control Accounts to resolve differences in the branch accounts made the men not only feared but revered her. Becky weld lot of power and control over the male staff so much that she did not think she could operate their kitchen and take care off their socks and push the pram of their babies.
At forty-one she had began to fell the void in her life. Her first endeavour was to step up her appearance to attract men. She wore very expensive clothes, none was worn twice. That only widened the gap between her and the male staff.. This made men distance from her. Her Mercedes 500 SL was top of the range. Not everyone wanted to park their cars near hers. At the Head Quarters meetings most men turned to avoid her even though she struggled to get close and mingle with them. Her life was complete when Dave came along. For the first time in her life she felt loved. She tried all means to make the marriage work. Trouble started when the couple have to decide who moved to live with the other. Initially, Becky did not want to leave the comfort of her pad. After series of persuasion Becky rented her house and moved in with Dave. War of roses started as the couples could not tell who gave the command and who had to obey. Becky would not subrogate her rights and liberties just for a successful marriage. They lived as strangers under the same roof. They have decided to buy a family car which did not work out the trick. Dave could not appreciate the amount put on the car when they all have very expensive cars already. To Dave it was sheer waste of money. Becky saw it another way a means to self-aggrandisement. The domestic chores also stood in the way of their happiness and a wedge keeping the parties apart. The problem was who cleared the plates and do the cooking? What time should the woman be home? Who took permission to do things and who granted the permissions? Who laid the table and did the cleaning of the pad. Becky thought she was above that anyway? Dave in his inferior position could not negotiate and enforce his right as the husband. Trouble came from left, right and centre. The frequent cease-fires could not mend the relationship. The couple held on for a year or two because of the court battle that breaking up would steer up. The amounts that would be required to be paid for their freedom served as a glue-factor keeping them together. The third year of the marriage saw the parties more or less living apart even though they slept under the same roof. So many times Dave felt like driving her out but friends stood in for Becky. The last straw was Becky’s excuses of staying late at work, she home at odd hours. Her visitation to friends alone and unannounced trips abroad made Dave suspicious. He had wanted to retaliate by finding a suitor but that did not work. He tried to bury himself in his lecturing job. That too became problem as he could not concentrate. The students went on strike demanding his resignation. This morning he reprimanded Becky for not getting the trash out for collection by the bin-man. “Who do you think you are? I am not coming here again.” That was how the marriage was terminated.